i wish you were here.

[ SPIRIT ] - ... [ MUSIC ] - ...

Friggen hell.

I had to delete my last post cos some people are GAY.

You know what from now on, if I write something that pisses someone off, I'm going to keep it up! :)

Anyways. This weekend has been pretty splendid.

Yesterday I went to the cinema with Shaun, Mike and David. We saw Sweeney Todd and I loved it so much. I want to be Helena Bonham Carter. That woman is amazing. And Johnny Depp <3 yum. I just loved it. Tim Burtin is a genius.

And then Mike and Shaun left, so David and I went to find a restaurant to eat in and we raded virgin. Then Marcus came, and we all had dinner in Sezzan. Twas yummay!

Then we went bowling, it was quite a pathetic game really haha. Marcus cracks me up he kept doing these weird jump things. It was adorable haha. David won in the end. Bluh bluh.

Then this morning I went to the desert with Christian and we went quadding. Well he went, I came alone to take pics. But friggen hell. I am terrified of bloody quadding, after I fell off one a few years ago. So when he said he'd need to drive me a bit just to get to some locations, I thought okay a little bit, it won't be alot...but it was. Haha.

At first I was like wetting myself, but then I relaxed and it was actually pretty fun. I got some really nice shots. And I LOVE the desert. I could have sat up there all day just watching the sand no jokes. It was lovely. But then it got really hot haha.

Tomorrow shall be a day full of drama coursework.

Joy.

A vlog is coming...I promise...I just need to remember to charge my camera one day.

:) xxxx

i skip a heart beat.

[ SPIRIT ] - ... [ MUSIC ] - ...

I know i am useless when it comes to updating this.

I just can't write on here alot of things that go on because too many unwanted people read it. Haha.

Gossip girl seems to have taken a toll at JC. Me, Scott, Steph, Jake and Paul had quite a rave in our frees today, leaving loads of random gossip in Gloria Green's honesty box. Apparently I have aids thanks to Thomas, and Aaron needs to get himself checked...oh and I'm having a thing with Isabella too, heh. And there's apparently photographic evidence. Haha.

I love it. IT's so funny.

Oh, and me Steph and Sam decided on what piece were doing for our final drama exam performace piece. Balthory. It's about Elizabeth Balthory, the vampire who killed loads of virgins for their blood so that she could bathe in it to keep herself young.

I'm playing Elizabeth! :D And Sam is playing Katarina, this weird witch woman who is a lesbian and loves me. And Steph is my servant Dorcka, haha, who is also in love with me, and Sam keeps hitting on her because she thinks Dorcka is a lesbian.

Its fabulous. Haha. Oh and me and Sam have a bit of lesbian action too. So all the guys are like WERE COMING TO WATCH!!!

Haha. It shall be awesome. Miss Cubbin has even given us her approval haha.

I think I am going to get a six pack by the end of this week, because I have been laughing insanely for the past two days. I don't think 10 minutes goes by where I'm not in hysterics about something. It's insane. Haha.

There's alot going on, on the boy front, but I'll save that for another time. I have to get to work and decide what it is I am doing for my art mock nexk week.

You know you love me, XO XO.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

but not together.

[ SPIRIT ] - confused. [ MUSIC ] - mika happy ending

What a crazy past few days.

Bush came to Dubai yesterday. So what do they do? They close off all the roads. Which means no school for us, but what about the few of us who had exams!?

Ah. Was a mission. Ended up staying at Kayleigh's which was so incredibly raving and going to school the next day. Some people went in at 4am, because the roads closed at 6am, but they wanted to miss the traffic and stuff. So stupid. Then the roads reopened at 5pm.

My exam went really well though, the question was perfect! Let's just hope I did okay as I think I did.

Then today I didn't go to school because I had a really bad headache, and I was too lazy to get up so my mum was like okay, you only have one lesson anyways.

So I spent the whole morning cleaning my room and attempting to detox myself of Aaron. It didn't really work, cos whenever I went to remove something it just made me uberly sad.

You'd think after 3 months I'd be okay. But apparently not. Ah. I miss him. Alot. And it sucks. But oh well.

Then I went to pick up my brother and sisters from school. The roads are all flooded from a week of raining, which is still going like mad! But is good cos school has been cancelled for the rest of the week apparently because the roads are SO badly damaged and flooded. We got caught in this big sand pit which had become a lake, and it was the only way round to the front of Wellington, and the water came up half way round our car. My mum was like just as long as the car doesn't stop we'll be fine! Haha was funny.

I brough 'The Secret Lives of Men and Women', one of the postsecret books today. I was sat in starbucks in Borders before I brought it reading through and flicking each page, when I came upon a starbucks napkin inside the book with a secret on it. ANd it made my day so much. I felt so special to have been able to read that persons secret.

But I think it may have jinxed the rest of my day. I don't really want to talk about that on here, but I think everything is okay now.

I'm going to keep that secret forever.

I think I might do it too. Write a secret and put it in a postsecret book and hope it makes someones day as much as it did mine.

not that kind of girl.

[ SPIRIT ] - annoyed. [ MUSIC ] - josh pyke

Eugene is a total legend.

Check out these photos i took today here

Ah. I love him.

My exam is next monday, and it's the long weekend now, and i feel somewhat depressed.

Like, I dunno. I want to just cry you know when you just have those days. But i physically can't let go.

I think my mum has to do that meditation thing on me again that she did after me and aaron broke up and i couldn't stop crying. Ah it was so weird. She touched all these special areas on my body and everythin was fine, then when she got to my heart i was actually like screaming how much i was crying. but i was like totally out of it, but still with it. it was so strange.

yeh.

i wanna do that again.

i want this exam to be over already, so i can just start on my art, i'm so excited about my mock! it's going to be awesome!!! :D

i don't know what to do about the boy situation. i really like him. but i'm scared to let myself go completely incase i really fall for him, and then he leaves, and i don't think i'll ever see him again really. so it'll just leave me uberly depressed.

but everyone says i should make the most of it now. i just don't know, if i can. i seem to have built and emotional block around myself and i don't want anyone to enter it.

i know i'm not writing with capital letters, i can't really be bothered cos i'm ranting.

baaaah.

i need to stop ranting.

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

i'm going to go watch a film. something funny.

hmmm...xxx

leave comments. i know you guys read this!

i love love.

[ SPIRIT ] - bored. [ MUSIC ] - boyfriend-ashlee simpson

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL YOU FELLOW ORTHDOX-PEEPS.

wee!

I've had such an awesome day. My presents were AMAZING!

Well for one I got Eugene, me and him have been fondling all day. He is amazing. Wee.

I got a removable hardrive, because i've needed one for SO long.

I got new clothes and stuff.

Got some makeup, umm choccies.

Yeh.

And a bunch of thingies for my camera. Yay. Eugene is totally geared up.

Last night I hung out with Justin, Was lovely. Had loads of fun. We went and had shisha at this arabic place in MOE, and the people hated us haha, the food took like an hour, and the waiter kept flirting with me haha. Spaz.

Then we went and watched a film. It was a prety raving night hah that boy cracks me up big times!

Back to school tomorrow. Rules.

I hate school. Yesterday was actually pointless, I had one lesson and the rest of the day was assemblies.

Bluh.

xxxxxx

i'm not myself.

[ SPIRIT ] - ... [ MUSIC ] - ...

I had such a rave today!!!

Spent the morning speaking to Peter, Justin and Julia, and then went and picked up Adam from his and we went to MOE.

Then we went shopping for xmas presents well, I did, he just dragged along, and we waited for Scott and Ozzy to show up. We finally found out that they had decided to dye Scott's hair so we had to wait till they finished that, so we just continued walking around. Was really fun actually haha.

Anyways they FINALLY got there, and we went and watched Wedding Daze. Was HILARIOUS. Haha. Ah lordy haven't laughed that hard in yonks. Then they all came back to mine, we had a few drinks, watched The heartbreak kid and had a bit of a rave.

Was really fun!!!

We haven't had a proper crew day in like 2 years haha.

Ah I do love those guys and I miss our days together so much!

Anyways we saw Miss D *who is now blonde!*, fergie, aamir, tarun, tom, andrew, nima, tim, pasha and amber! haha. Maddddneeeess!

Getting my second lasering done tomorrow dun dun dun. Not looking forward to it.

Weeeeeeee. I am off to bed now!

LOVE MUCH

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

ps. MY RENTS BROUGHT ME EUGENE. :D

better than the original?

[ SPIRIT ] - ... [ MUSIC ] - ...

One of my old friends told me that this guy we had met a few times had been on ozzy idol and had got pretty far, but I didn't actually believe him. So I checked him out, and he was right.

I'm so proud of you Ben!

You should have won. His voice is amazing. And he totally owns this song.

I love his version almost as much as the original.

Check him out